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WORRY/ANXIETY Fixing Your Self-Esteem Session 2 Charles Hodges MD |
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| III. How can we help? |
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| H. Fifth session: Changing to a Biblical standard. | |
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1. The counselee must change the basis on which inaccurate inferiority judgments. 2. Help the counselee place his perceptions in categories. 3. First category is inaccurate. a. Nobody cares about me or loves me. b. I can’t do anything right. c. Counselee must make an honest appraisal according to the scriptures. 4. Second category is accurate but not sinful. a. I’m to short or fat. b. I’m not very smart or I’m a slow learner. c. I’m not a good singer, speaker, or athlete. d. Problem begins with comparison which scripture says is unwise. 2 Cor.10:12. e. Comparisons are often made for the purpose of praising or commending ourselves and should not be done. f. Pride is often the root of these comparisons. g. When pride in appearance, achievement, intelligence, or skill becomes more important than glorifying God, it prevents us from using the gifts we do have to benefit others. 2Cor.5:9 h. Counselee must replace comparison and pride with contentment in gifts God has given and using them to serve others. 5. Third category is accurate and sinful. a. I’m lazy, undisciplined, or have a quick temper. b. I’m a terrible husband or don’t manage time well. c. I get angry easily. d. Counselee usually expects allowances to be made for them. e. Repentance, confession, forgiveness, restitution, progressive sanctification will need to be applied. f. May need to learn new Biblical behavior for role as husband, wife, child, parent, employee, church member, or neighbor. May need to learn to deal with anger, fear and worry and other skills to replace old behavior. 6. Counselee must respond Biblically to being sinned against. a. Must abandon attitude that every event is a disaster. b. Put on a Rom.8:28-29, James 1:2-5 view of trouble. c. This allows them to look at offenders differently and apply Romans 12:18-20 to them. Use the 6 steps of dealing with anger here. d. Instead of fear or anger they can respect what God is going to do in their lives. e. Learn to deal with Problem people. Matt.5;23-25, 18:15, 2Tim. 2:24-26. James 2:12-13. f. Learn and use a Biblical pattern for forgiveness. 7. Perfectionism and legalism need to go. a. Derived rules of the house are not equivalent to scripture. b. Personal preferences should not be applied as scripture. c. Counselee must put off the practice of keeping the rules in order to feel accepted. |
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I. Nearly done. Counselee must choose. |
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1. Joshua 24:14-15, Children of Israel had to choose who they would serve: the gods of the Egyptians or God. 2. Egyptians had Gods for every need, but they were powerless. 3. Seeking to raise self esteem to feel and act normally is similar idol worship and it is powerless powerless to correct emotions and behavior. 4. Instead, choose to glorify God by loving Him and your Neighbor and serving both. Happiness, joy, powerless blessedness follows. John 13:17 |
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